I got this link from a dear friend today. Rather than you clicking on it, let me just repost it here.
“AND if I should ever go away, well then close your eyes and try to feel the way we do today. And then if you can remember: Keep smiling, keep shining knowing you can always count on me, for sure. That’s what friends are for. For good times and bad times, I’ll be on your side forever more. That’s what friends are for.”
Well, if the words are very familiar to you, it’s because they were quoted from a Burt Bacharach song, which was made famous by Dionne Warwick (although Rod Steward also sang the same song as theme song of a movie).
Panagbenga 2009 blog
American author and speaker Steve Stephens listed five reasons why we need friends.
For one, friends provide perspective. “No matter how capable you are, there will be days you feel lost, when you need some clear direction, some fresh ideas, or just a different perspective,” he explains.
For another, friends provide company. “Good friends provide a distraction from the pressures of your day, comfort from the hurts of life, and escape from loneliness,” Stephens writes.
“Sometimes friends laugh with you and sometimes they cry with you, but most important, friends are always willing to be with you when you need them.”
The third reason: friends provide a place to vent. “Some days you can handle the difficulties that press you down; other days you just have to let it all out,” he points out.
“A friend is willing to listen when you just feel like complaining about the injustices and annoyances that fill this world.”
Friends also provide accountability. To be accountable, Stephens says, “is to consent to being watched and questioned. Allowing yourself to be transparent and vulnerable is a wonderful protection against temptation and naivete. You let them catch you when you fall and lift you back to the place where you know you should be.”
Lastly, friends provide encouragement. Stephens states, “Sometimes it’s easy to lose hope. The frustrations of the past haunt you, the stress of the present overwhelms you, and the prospect of the future discourages you. When you are overwhelmed, you need at least one cheerleader.” And that cheerleader is your friend.
“Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joy, and dividing our grief,” said Joseph Addison. Pam Brown adds, “In loneliness, in sickness, in confusion — the mere knowledge of friendship makes it possible to endure, even if the friend is powerless to help. It is enough that they exist. Friendship is not diminished by distance or time, by imprisonment or war, by suffering or silence. It is in these things that it roots most deeply. It is from these things that it flowers.”
Tim McGraw sums up the value of friends in these words: “If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn’t jump with them; I’d be at the bottom to catch them. Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don’t say. We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other everywhere.”
But some friendships never last forever. There are instances where friends become enemies. But there are also those that mend their differences and become friends again.
“When we develop friendships, we intend for them to last. But since two fallen human beings are involved, occasional hurt feelings and unmet expectations are likely. If one or both people simply ignore the offense, the relationship can be damaged,” explains Dr. Charles Stanley in his In Touch Daily Devotional.
But friendship can be restored and saved. “Repairing a troubled friendship requires humility to admit our faults, effort to fix the problem, and time,” he writes.
“But the reward is a renewed connection with a valued companion. The process of saving a friendship begins when you acknowledge that damage exists. This takes place the moment you say, I feel something isn’t right in our relationship. I’d like for us to find and fix the problem.”
Dr. Stanley said the two individuals must work together in order for them to save their friendship. For one, both should assess how the trouble started. Perhaps it resulted from a misunderstanding, an unresolved conflict, or one person being so busy.
(For comments, write me at henrytacio@gmail.com.)
I can only say: Cheers to friendship!
ShAKChI
So here are my HighSchool Friends. GradeShcool wouldn’t be the same without them. We’ve been together since 4th grade and up to this day, we try to keep in touch as often as we can.
It was harder to keep in touch when we were in College, having chosen different fields and making new college friends.
And yet, here we are. Still holding on. This I have to say: this is the first tie I have other than family that brings to mind “home”.
A home will always be a place you look forward to after a long day. A stressful day. Or a happy, productive day. Friendship should be like that. No matter what happens, the fights, the tampuhans, you would still end up together. The mindset would always be: this shall pass.
And so, yes, there is home in this friendship. We called ourselves SHAKCHI then (just like any other kids of that age, hehe) Sh (Sheryll) A (Anne) K (Kristine) Ch (Cherry) and I (Ivy).
Circle of Letters
Now this is the group I sticked out thru college. And there was Jenny, too, albeit a different friend tie.
This is P, C, B, A and Q. We call ourselves by the first letter of our names. I know, very Gossip Girl-y. But hey, we started this before the sitcom. And just like the sitcom, we adopted this name calling for text-efficiency! Hahaha!
This group has seen me thru bad and thru good. More than anybody else, this circle has seen me grow (matured?) as they to me. Well, we were the ones together in the so-called messed-up-teener-years… the adolescent stage? Somewhere between child and adult. The curious stage in one’s life.
Oh, the fights we had, the boys we gushed about, to the first bottle of beer! I’d go back to College all over again with these crazy people! To the outside world, we were very fastidious in our study (daw!). We never went out at night. No gimik. We have to be home at a certain time of the day, no late nights except for class and if we do, we have to show our student load to our parents. Hahaha! No overnights unless we have to for academics or for enrollment. And we still find ourselves escorted by parents for enrollment! Hahaha!
I have to say, I grew up with them. We grew up together. We got curious together. We learned together. And I like the support that we all have. Well, there are still some of us who are still curious in some things, right? The learning curve still hasn’t drop….
Sould Friends
And then there’s Jenny. Soulfriend. I met her when I got separated from my college buddies. We all got separated. Different blocks.
Jenny was that girl who introduced me to her boys. You could say, she initiated me. Hahaha! The Circle of Letters was always deemed to be a man hater’s club (except for B). You can make your own theories on why we were man-haters club, it just is.
But with J, she introduced me to all her crack ups with her boys. We went to the Engineering Campus of our college, do crazy stuff there. All in good fun. We shared a lot of things together, even crushes. Hahaha! Thus, we called ourselves soulfriends. But more than the boys, there was music we shared, too. You see, she was in a highschool band and it’s something that I really think is cool. We love the same songs, and she masters all the lyrics. I can still remember how envious I was every time she sings Spiderweb. I like that song! Hands down there. I call her Mommy as Mommy. Her Daddy as Daddy and Kuya as Kuya.
Chayix
And then there’s Chai. OH MY!
Hahaha! Now this girl is my party girl. My kind of hommie! Hahaha! She got me drunk the first time! Oh the antics we did together. Our hobby? Bar hopping! Clubbing! Hahaha. Concerts, street parties, cocktails (no beer for us!), learning billiards, the works! And this time, she and I were dealing with men. So over with boys! Hahaha. She became an integral part of my after-college life. How did that ever turned to be? I was working while she was still in college. We were just too in synch!
Now, here is the person who witnessed a lot of my firsts. We do crazy stuff but we are each other’s moral ground. As said: friends look out for each other. If all else fails, we ride the bandwagon together, right?
Definitely, these are the people in my life that I would catch at the bottom if they jump off the bridge! Cheers to friendship! And to whatever lies before us, “hawak-kamay”! Hahaha!
